Archive for August 2009

I miss school

August 27, 2009

Well not all school. Just high school. And not all of high school. Just the mornings. Especially mornings like today. Today, as I was dropping off my brother and my mom at school and work respectively, it happened to be a very blistery, windy, yet sunny and oddly enjoyable late summer morning. It was this kind of morning that I did not mind waking up “ridiculously” early at 7:00AM every morning to make it to a 7:35AM class. It was this kind of morning that definitely added a skip in my step, so to speak. This kind of morning that made me eager to see my friends, even if I had seen them the day before. These kinds of mornings I was excited for school. Waking up with only a few hours a sleep seemed justified. I lived for these mornings.

What I wouldn’t give to go back in time and relive just one of these mornings, seeing old friends, new friends, track friends, reg friends…

Now that I’m about to start my sophomore year of college, I look back on high school with much rosier glasses than I could have before. But not completely to the point where I call them halcyonic days. As Shawn said in his graduation speech, “I could’ve done better” (Boy Meets World). I definitely would have made different choices. Tried harder in school. Faked being outgoing. But, given who I was and where I ended up as a person, I’m satisfied with what high school has done for me. And even if it wasn’t what I thought it would be, high school and the people I met there have given me the ability and the fortunate grace of being able to appreciate the small, and often insignificant things in life. Even if it is just a windy Thursday morning.


A Dream Analysis… Kinda

August 7, 2009

I promised a fried that I would analyze my dreams that I remember because I unwittingly told her to do the same. So here’s my second dream that I remember. Analysis will come after.

I was in a very big auditorium, I think at some college, or at least somewhere very prestigious. And the function must have been important. Because the auditorium was packed. It looked like the center of an Olympic stadium and it was filled to capacity. Maybe it was some sort of exhibition or gala, cause I was supposed to perform with a few other people that I don’t remember, except two. I remember Thomas Tran and Jackie Boone having to perform with me and whenever either of us did something embarrassing on stage, we’d cover the other. There were a few times where I wasn’t in the auditorium, either for a intermission, or before the show, but I’d be riding on the back of a bike with my friend Gordon popping wheelies on the street. It looked looked a run down section of Gueneville with train tracks at the end. And every so often, I’d be down by the tracks, and have a close encounter with a truck or train coming down.

But anyway, back it in the auditorium, we did a total of three performances, the first two I don’t remember, but the last one involved a bus and us painting it. There was no stage fright, no inhibitions, I just went up and improved and had fun and tried to get a laugh out of the audience. I threw my prop cause I knew I did terribly after it was done and the director scolded me for it. Then he asked all the performers to sit in the bleachers on stage and me, Thomas, and Jackie sat in the top of them, over looking the audience who had curiously become emoticons. I saw one of my middle school classmate’s younger sister, and we had a brief conversation. The only thing I remember from that conversation was she was going to Riordan High School in the fall. Then a Filipino guy walked in. This guy was terrible at jokes, and would always produce awkward silences. He was showing off a piece of art to be put up around the place I was, and he continued to make the most awkward silence he had yet. While he was going on about the piece and before he made the silence, Jackie told me that her mom and her were going to move out of the state because Jackie had cancer. I remember turning back to the presentation and when the awkwardness was palpable I made the drum sound effect, the entire audience turned into various shades of the same emoticon, and the silence was broken. I grinned and laughed. But then the gum that I was chewing that I did not know I had went down my thoat and woke me up.

So for the analysis then. Just a note to say if there are symbols that I don’t explicitly explain, it means I was unable to find what the meant.

A bicycle means trying to find balance between work and play. A pick-up truck represents hard work or the need to go back to basics. Train tracks indicate either a diligent working towards my goals or that I need to get off the beaten path once in a while. The train itself represents conformity, a passenger train (which is what I saw) specifically means mental work. It also has the other possible meaning of being “in training”.

Painting is need to let go of creativity or covering something up. It was yellow paint which supposedly means joy, happiness, and energy. When someone else has cancer, it means I need to start thinking positively before I start a cancer in myself. To chew gum means I am unable to express myself effectively. Most of the other motifs in this dream were disappointingly elusive.

I can’t even begin to wrap my head around what all this means, so I’ll save it for another time.

All these interpretations were found here:

So Fresh, So Clean

August 1, 2009

I don’t know where that saying is from, but it was what I used as the basis of my tweet at 2:00PM today. You see, at 2:00PM today, I biologically turned 19. And I don’t feel that much different, though slightly sick all the same.

So like most of my birthdays since 2003, I celebrated some of my birthday in Cazadero, California, specifically Camp Royaneh. And this year, I was a real “adult” leader, since I wasn’t a scout anymore. It was still a lot of fun, and probably one of the few places where I could have a crappy day and still feel it was a good birthday. Although, it is probably better if I celebrate at Royaneh either sober, or with a lot of sleep the day before.

I expected this to be longer, but that’s all I feel like I have to say on the subject. Just know, Alex Yi, that your nineteenth birthday, specifically between the hours of 12:00AM and 3:00AM, was just too ridiculous for words.